My Post-Separation Family Holiday and the Help I Needed

 

After Michael and I separated, one question that came up was whether there would be any more annual family Summer holidays. We had a tradition of joining my parents at their holiday home up north each January for a week or so. But did we really want to continue that tradition?

Turns out the answer was yes and no.

First Annual Family Summer Holiday Post-Separation

Timing was a bit interesting for this one. We realised once the dust settled on news of the separation, that the annual family Summer holiday was already booked and paid for. So, after discussion, we went ahead with it. It was not worth cancelling and disrupting the kids even more than we already had.

Always happy to receive trusted professional help, I asked that one of our therapy sessions at the time be used to discuss any possible pitfalls and how to deal with them. We went into the holiday hopeful and respectful.

I wrote about the experience in a blog post titled How to Go on Holiday with your Recently Separated Husband. 

Second Annual Family Summer Holiday Post Separation

The issue of what to do this January came up last September when the family holiday planning kicked into gear. My first thought was to skip it. As well as it went, I didn’t want a repeat of last year. Yet I didn’t want to go alone and Michael miss out on this special time with the girls.

While discussing it with my Aunt and sharing my concerns, she came up with a brilliant suggestion – for Michael and I to tag team the holiday with the girls. As soon as she said it, I knew it was a yes from me. After checking with Michael and my parents it was a yes from them. So we did it.

Michael took the girls up and stayed with them the first week, then flew home. Then I flew up, spent the second week with the girls and bought them home. My parents were with them the whole time. It worked well, no doubt helped by the fact all the adults involved get along.

But it reminds me there are as many solutions to family issues as there are people. Be creative, brave and willing to try new ideas.

PLUS Be OK with Accepting Help 

I am 100% confident I would not have come up with this ‘tag-team’ solution by myself. I need help with ideas. That’s not the only thing I need help with in my life. The list is long and I am not ashamed to need – and accept – help. It might come in the form of a different perspective, support, guidance or a kick up the arse. But I choose which help to accept wisely and so should you.

There are a million people ready to tell you how to live your life, all aspects of it. My starting place, if I’m unsure, is to still the voices in my mind and seek to hear my internal wisdom. There I find the answers that are already and always there.

I’ve worked for many years to build the muscle of listening to my inner wisdom and trusting my intuition. Now the work I do as a Coach often weaves this important skill into the toolbox for my clients.

If you need help to access this wisdom, consider working with a Coach (like myself), therapist or energy healer. It’s an investment that will last a lifetime.

 

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 Love to hear your words of wisdom, insight or experiences! Feel free to share in the Comments below.

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